Trying The Couples Counseling NY Professionals Suggest Can Save A Struggling Relationship

By Christine Bell


Living together can be difficult, no matter how much you love one another. Everyday life is not always what newlyweds imagined it would be. As time goes on, everyone grows and has experiences that profoundly change them. Without constant communication, a couple can grow apart. When this happens, it might be time to consider the couples counseling NY professionals say can change the course of the relationship.

There are common signs that a relationship is in trouble. Communication may become virtually nonexistent except during an argument or crisis. One partner may feel that the other is moving ahead alone, which creates a sense of isolation and abandonment. Secrets can destroy relationships unless someone intervenes.

If you have decided to give a counselor a try, you need to go into it with an open mind and a willingness to listen and learn. This is the time and place to be totally honest with a partner and the professional guiding the sessions. You can say whatever you feel, as long as it is respectful and true. If one partner becomes defensive, hostile, or refuses to be emotionally honest, this experiment is going to fail.

Children are blessings, but they can create a new set of problems for a couple. They unite some partners and divide others. Mothers, who often feel they are doing the bulk of the work while the father is not, can easily become overwhelmed. A newborn demands so much time and attention on the mother's part that the father can begin to feel like an extra shoe, with no real function or place.

Couples contemplating divorce should consider talking to an impartial third party before making a final decision. Talking to a counselor doesn't mean you won't decide to go through with the divorce. It often gives couples a chance to discuss what got them to this crossroads and whether they believe the relationship could be salvaged under the right circumstances. If not, as least they will communicate more effectively going forward.

Once divorce has become an inevitability, it may not seem like going to a counselor has any real purpose. Many couples find that talking to an unbiased third party during this time is a good way to open lines of communication, if only for the sake of the children. The counselor can help a couple find ways to remain civil to one another and maintain a united front.

Divorces are not easy on children, no matter how congenial the parents try to be. Kids can withdraw or lash out. Their grades often suffer. Running away is not uncommon. Counseling can be a safe place for children to talk about their fears and anxieties, in the presence of an nonjudgmental adult who will keep their confidences. Combined parent-child sessions can also be productive especially if the adults are willing to listen to the child.

Relationships between two people can be difficult to maintain. When it gets too hard to talk to each other, an unbiased professional can be helpful. It might make the difference between staying together and splitting up.




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